On June 6, 2008, my alcoholism led me to Guest House in Rochester, Minnesota. If I had compiled a list of what I thought being sober would be like that first month, I would have sold myself short. Contained in “How it Works,” page 58 of the Big Book, we find the sentence, “Our stories disclose in a general way what we used to be like, what happened and what we are like now.”

Bottom line, my life had become unmanageable. I found no joy or purpose in life, except to pursue the next drink—alcohol had become my higher power. Though I acknowledged abusing alcohol, I struggled saying that I was an alcoholic. Gradually, I found myself becoming more and more isolated from family, friends, and ministry.

The turning point

Then came the pivotal moment when God did for me what I could not do for myself. I found myself in an ICU with severe health issues. That was the day I surrendered to win. Today, I understand this is one of the oxymorons of alcoholism: I was defeated! Thus began my journey to a new happiness, and a new freedom.

After returning home, my doctors determined my lingering balance and speech difficulties were due to a brainstem stroke. My doctor told me I was lucky to be alive, and I should dwell on what I could do and not what I couldn’t do—advice I now share with newcomers in the rooms. We alcoholics tend to dwell on things we believe we can never do again, like enjoy life. Our literature states, “We stop fighting anything and anyone, including alcohol.” Just as I had to learn to adapt to life with stroke-related challenges, Guest House taught me how to adjust to life without drinking.