Kids and Teens Affected by Family Addiction

Individuals & Family Support

Support For Kids & Teens

Helping a Child When a Family Member Has a Problem With Alcohol or Drugs

When addiction affects a family, adults may be focused on the person who needs treatment. Children and teens need attention and support, too. They may notice more than adults realize and have questions they do not know how to ask.

These resources help parents, caregivers, relatives, educators, and parish leaders understand what a child may be experiencing, begin an age-appropriate conversation, and find support for that child. Help can begin whether or not the family member is receiving treatment.

Understand the Impact

A parent’s, sibling’s, or another family member’s alcohol or drug use can affect a child’s sense of safety, relationships, and everyday life. The effects may continue even when the family member enters recovery or no longer lives in the home.

What adults may notice

*Some children say very little or appear to be managing well. These observations do not establish a diagnosis, but they can open a conversation about how the child is doing.

Start Here

NACoA: Help a Child Affected by Family Addiction

Guidance for adults on recognizing a child’s needs, explaining addiction, and providing dependable support. Includes access to a free caregiver guide.

Talk With a Child

Begin with what the child has noticed. Use short, honest explanations that fit their age and understanding. Give them time to respond and expect to return to the conversation.

Ask what they understand

You might say

“You may have noticed that things have been different at home. What have you been wondering about?”

Listen before adding information. Answer the question they ask without giving details they do not need.

Explain the problem simply

For a younger child

“Dad has a problem with alcohol that sometimes changes how he acts. He needs help from adults who understand this problem.”

For a teen

“Your sister is having difficulty with drug use. That can affect her behavior and the rest of the family. What has this been like for you?”

Address blame directly

You might say

“Nothing you said or did caused this. It is not your job to make them stop. Adults are responsible for getting help and taking care of you.”

Make room for mixed feelings

You might say

“You can love them and still feel angry, disappointed, or scared. You can talk with me about those feelings.”

Avoid defending the family member, asking the child to take sides, or treating their feelings as disloyalty.

Offer something dependable

You might say

“Aunt Maria will pick you up after school today. If plans change, I will tell you. You can call me if you are worried.”

Only promise what you can follow through on. If the child asks when the family member will get better, it is okay to say you do not know.

Conversation Guide

NACoA: Language When Talking With Kids and Teens

Suggestions for explaining a family member’s addiction sensitively and in language a child can understand.

Conversation Tool

NACoA’s Seven Cs

Created by Jerry Moe, the Seven Cs help adults reinforce that a child did not cause the addiction and cannot control or cure it, while encouraging attention to feelings and the child’s own life. Introduce them gradually and leave room for questions.

Find Support for a Child

A child can benefit from support focused on their own experience, even while adults are working on treatment or recovery for the family member.

Connect with a professional

Speak with the child’s pediatrician, school counselor, or a licensed mental health professional. Ask about experience helping children affected by family addiction and options appropriate for the child’s age.

You might say

“There is alcohol or drug use affecting this child’s family. I would like help understanding what support would be appropriate.”

Support everyday life

Help maintain reliable meals, school attendance, transportation, and time with friends. Make room for interests and activities that are about the child. Avoid asking them to monitor substance use, manage adult conflict, or take responsibility for a family member’s recovery.

Choose resources that fit the child

Review materials before sharing them. Consider the child’s age, questions, and experiences, and offer to explore a resource together. A handout or video can support a conversation; follow up to ask what the child thought or needs.

Materials for Adults

NACoA Tools for Kids

Resources adults can review and use to help a child understand addiction in the family.

Teen Resources for Adults to Review

NACoA Just 4 Teens

Information, videos, and support options that adults can review when deciding what may help a teen affected by parental addiction.

Peer Support Option

Alateen

A support community for young people affected by someone else’s drinking. Adults can learn about the program and help a teen explore an appropriate meeting. Confirm age requirements and arrangements with the group.

A family member entering treatment does not immediately resolve a child’s worry or restore trust. Continue asking how the child is doing and maintain the support already in place.

Support Younger Children

Sesame Street Workshop Resources

Sesame Workshop offers guidance for adults and materials to use with younger children affected by parental addiction. Its resources can help caregivers explain changes, maintain routines, and reconnect after a parent has been away for treatment.

Build trust through everyday care

Use brief, regular check-ins and follow through on everyday plans. Reading together, sharing a meal, or keeping a familiar bedtime routine can offer opportunities to reconnect. Allow the child to express uncertainty without expecting them to feel close again immediately.

Make plans a child can understand

Show the child what will happen this week, including who will care for them. If arrangements change, explain the new plan simply. Adults should arrange backup care and share the information with the people who may need it.

Webinar for Adults

Supporting Whole Family Recovery with Sesame Street

A 30-minute conversation with Sesame Workshop and NACoA about reconnecting after addiction treatment. Covers trust, emotional connection, routines, and planning for children’s care.

Storybook to Use Together

All About Karli: A Story About Reconnecting

A story about Karli and her mother reconnecting after her mother receives help for addiction. Adults can preview it and read it with a child to open a conversation about time apart and rebuilding relationships.